I received a text a few weeks ago.
This text made me so happy. It made me fall in love with the idea of writing even more.
A client with whom I’d worked in the past wanted to let me know about something miraculous that had happened in her life. Back when we were working together, she desperately wanted something, she would often cry over it and it was very heartbreaking to see her this way. I knew there wasn’t any active way to help her in this situation. It was beyond my help and all I could do was help her relax, listen to her talk about the disappointment over and over. But I was determined to help her in some way that would give her at least some hope, relief, and direction.
During one session after she yet again talked about the thing she so badly wanted, I made her do an activity. She was reluctant at first. She didn’t think it would help but we did it anyway.
Here’s what we did, explaining it to you, step by step
First, I made her take a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to write down about this thing she wanted. In great detail. She told me she felt weird to see it in front of her eyes, as it kept reminding her of how she doesn’t have it.
Second, we changed the way the sentences were framed. Instead of ‘I want we changed it to ‘I have. We framed the sentences in a way that she already had the thing she desperately wanted.
Third, I asked her to describe it, in writing, the way she would in her mind. I asked her to write about why she wanted this, how was it going to make her feel, how is she living with it every day.
Lastly, I asked her to keep writing this in her journal every day. Once during the morning and once in the night. I informed her that she could not miss a single day under any circumstances and that she needed to do this very medicinally.
I knew this was a gamble. I knew this was based on consistency and patience. And my client had a problem with both. She was not only getting impatient but losing faith. She tried for a couple more days and got tired of all the writing. Nothing was happening. She told me she was done with this dream/goal and that it was time to face the reality of the matter.
As long as my client was in a healthy space, I accepted her decision to move on. Things got better she did start to focus on other things and she looked happier, peaceful, calmer, and more focused. But she would always mention this dream of hers so very fondly. Something told me she still had some hope left in her. But I didn’t want to nudge her regarding this, not unless she wanted to do something about it. Our session ended. We both got busy in our lives.
A couple of weeks ago, she sent me a text. In this text she told me about how she couldn’t give up the idea of her dream, she decided to do the only thing she thought made sense. Try the writing visualization once more. But this time, she had nothing to lose, she was calmer and more patient. She bought a journal, especially to write about this dream of hers. And every day, just like we discussed, she filled them up with her dreams. Just like a painter paints a picture, only she used words. Each day, she would take her cup of coffee, her journal and just lose herself in that world.
She confessed that she wasn’t sure if it was going to work but writing about it as if it’s already happening, gave her so much relief. She told me how her words changed the scenario every day. How she got better at understanding this dream of hers. How each day she used to look forward to this writing. She filled pages and pages, notebook after notebook. In her words, she wasn’t obsessed with her dream/goal but writing about it made her fall in love with it, something that she believed was missing back then.
Some weeks ago, things regarding this dream started to happen. And over time they’d come to pass. Albeit not exactly how she had written them but it was pretty similar. However, she told me it was so much better than what she had imagined or written. She told me how she used this visualization practice for other things that had come to pass too. But when this happened, it was almost miraculous and something she had to and needed to share with me.
I was so grateful. It was unbelievable but I’ve used this technique several times and know the science behind the power of repetition has on our brain, mind, thoughts and choices. So, I had no difficulty believing it. But I knew consistency played a major role here.
She wasn’t a writer she found the task of writing quite boring but I guess in this case, it was all she could hold on to. So, she powered through.
I understand this approach may not be as soothing as my client’s experience was. Believe me, my experiences have also been pretty sour and tedious. But I do believe that the elements at play here are clarity, repetition, and perseverance. The outcome is rarely predicted to be affirmative or positive but writing down our dreams/plans/goals tend to help us envision them with better clarity.
You certainly don’t have to be a good writer to pen things down. They can be simple although descriptive, in a language that feels comfortable to you. The main ingredient here will be patience and not forget faith that it’ll work.
I can’t tell you how long this can take, so just to experiment, try with small wishes and hopes. See how they work for you. And the way they make you feel. As long as you’re 100% sure about what you want and descriptive about the way you visualize it, it could work for you.
Here’s what will help –
Make sure about what you want
Why do you want it?
Instead of focusing on how you get it, focus on how you feel once you get it
Focus on that feeling of achievement as much as you can, paint a picture about that feeling.
This experience is different for each person and takes a lot of practice for the belief to kick in. But there’s absolutely no harm in trying.
I hope this helps you in some way. If you happen to practice this, do write to me nikitavyas@outlook.in or dm me on Instagram. Thank you for reading. If you liked the article, don’t forget to like the heart.
All my love,
Nikita