4 Techniques I use to understand the inner critic in me
In my program, week 02 is about getting clarity and confidence by quieten your inner critical voice. This is a module that really amazes people. I think it does that because I ask them to use these internal voices as a pathway or messages to bring more clarity.
When our inner voice says –
“You cannot do this!”
“You are a failure!”
“You aren’t good enough!”
“You aren’t ready!”
We naturally feel ashamed or embarrassed of ourselves. We feel really bogged down by the emotions and feelings attached with these thoughts and beliefs. But what if we take it as a message instead of taking it as criticism?
#1 – Ask Questions
When we hear a voice that says – “You cannot do this” – We feel disheartened and agree with our critical voice. But what if we stop and ask that voice, “Hey, you say I cannot do this, but why not? Why can’t I do this? What’s the problem? Where is your proof?”
Asking questions to probe further is also a way of self-counselling. We use this during sessions and asking questions further brings more clarity.
#2 – Compassionately Motivate
The Inner critical voice is afraid. That’s why it creates a blockage by telling us we aren’t ready or good enough. The message that we receive here is that the critical mind needs motivation and support. By compassionately encouraging the critical voice we tend to quieten the fear.
When our critical voice says – “You aren’t good enough” or “You aren’t ready” We can encourage our critical voice by saying, “I agree with you, I’m not good enough right now but with practice I will be” “Yes, I may not be ready but I’m ready to give it a shot. I’ll learn and with time, I’ll feel ready”
#3 – Challenging your critical Voice
The inner critical voice tends to stop and distract us because it’s scared and it tries to scare us too. When we feel as if our critical voice is overpowering we can try challenging it. Challenge the thoughts and beliefs. Sometimes when we become rebellious, we are fueled with confidence and courage. The message we take here that sometimes it’s important to fight and challenge.
#4 – Saying No
Our critical voice has this influence over us. So each time it says, “you are worthless” we say, “yes, maybe I am” When it says, “You’ll make a fool of yourself” we say “Yes I will”
but what if we start to say No? What if we say, “NO I’m not worthless. I am worthy!” “No, I wont make a fool of myself, in fact I’ll have a good time!” – The message we receive here is that we need to stand up to ourselves.
These are some of the methods I use and teach as well in my program and you can try it out as well. We all experience doubts and fear and there’s no way to never feel it. But using such methods we try to lessen the affect it has over us.