Finding it difficult to "let go" - Try this technique
Couple of weeks back something really weird happened. It wasn’t until I gave it some thought that I actually realized and understood what was really going on. I love books, I read a lot and over the years I’ve accumulated a fair share of books. Eventually this gave rise to my desperate need of a book shelf. After a lot of thought and debating over it, I finally decided to buy one from a furniture shop nearby. We’d already bought a few good pieces from there and I figured why not? It’s close-by, reliable and they promised a quick delivery.
Cut to the day of the delivery, my bookshelf was not going to come home today. Naturally I couldn’t let go and kept waiting and following up with the dealer, because he promised he should’ve delivered. It was now a week since I’d placed an order and I was beyond pissed. Obviously, I went to pick a fight with the dealer and eventually had to cancel my order. I was so upset, I shed a tear as well. I spent and wasted an entire week trying to get my bookshelf home, I couldn’t concentrate on my work, my clients. I was so angry at their professionalism and their service and swore to never set foot there again. I know I must sound really out of control to you but wait for it... here comes the best part.
A few days later My mom with her sister went out and they landed up going to home centre. She saw a bookshelf which was the kind I wanted and placed an order. Within 24 hours it was installed. By that time, I’d already forgotten all about it and there it was, in my house and installed.
You see? Crazy right? But most of the times we tend to do this. Of course, this was a very small example of what I mean by letting go. But have you ever felt about controlling situations or people or places strongly? It becomes your mission to take charge, especially if you’re someone who is short tempered, impulsive, impatient.
You might go ahead to point out and say that it was completely okay to take charge and follow up, after all I was going to pay for it and it was therefore my responsibility to follow up. Is it wrong to take charge of something? That’s honestly debatable but it does affect your day-to-day living. If you’ve set out to live a mindful living then it’s important to learn to let go and let life take charge for a while. It’s normal and completely okay to let go.
Here’s a small exercise that can help you to let go and relax.
“Sit in a relaxed position either on the floor, chair or the bed. Sit with your back straight and legs uncrossed. Place your palms on your thighs facing upward. Close your eyes, think of something that you want to take control of, it could be a situation, a person, an event, a thought, anything... think about it, visualize it as clearly as you can take a deep breath and clench your fist tightly (not very tight, we don’t want to cause any pain) and slowly loosen the grip and open your hand and breathe out from your mouth. As you open your hand imagine or say that you now let go and no longer control that thought, situation, person or whatever you were trying to or wanted to control.” Repeat this till you feel relaxed and less stressed or angry. You’ll notice that as you let go and un-clench your palm while imagining to let go of that person or situation, you feel more positive, get more clarity and experience immediate sense of rest and joy.
This simple exercise can be done anytime and anywhere. This can help you if you are prone to more anxiety, anger, fear, envy or jealousy, overwhelmed, panic, guilt, constant worry. Do try this the next time you feel like you need to control a situation. Of course, like everything in life this also requires a lot of practice. It may feel uncomfortable at first but it’s important to remember that this will help a great deal in the long run.
Hope this would have helped you get some clarity in your struggle to let go. If this article is a must read for someone you know, feel free to share with them. Do post below and let me know if you’ve given this exercise a try and it makes you feel better.
Thank you for taking the time to read it. Write to me to let me know if you’d like me to write on something related to your needs. Do let me know if this exercise helps you calm your nerves.