Hey there, today I want to talk to you about strengths. How our strengths make us unique and why it’s so so important to embrace them. My name is Nikita. I’m a Psychologist and life Coach. I help creative and Introverted women unburden their busy life from overwhelm, anxiety & Self-Doubt. I help them take the big leap and achieve what you truly desire.
Talking about strengths can be quite repetitive but I somehow felt I needed to talk about it with you today.
I’ve always been complimented on how I’m such a good listener, how well I empathize with others and how its so easy for people to connect with me.
Back in the day when I was in college these praises didn’t seem like my strengths and skills. I mean everybody listens right? Everybody is a good listener. How does that make me unique or special? Initially these compliments didn’t really feel as if they mattered much. In fact, I used to be quite disappointed when people would tell me this.
I would often say ‘Why can’t I be complimented more for my writing skills? It’s so not fair! This basically means I don’t have any skills or strengths and I don’t matter. How is listening going to help me get a good career?’
Of course, it was when I started my masters in Psychology and further in my career of personal development, that I realized how not only were these skills important but also a requirement. I realized how my skills could evolve with time, practice and experience. I also realized how valuable my skills were which I couldn’t before.
Having a unique skill doesn’t mean out of the ordinary or different. It’s much more personal than that. The thing that makes your ordinary skill extraordinary is how well you embrace it and use it in your life.
I’ve worked with clients who’ve realized in their journey of transformation that they have so many skills they hadn’t even though about earlier or discovered before.
They realized they had a plethora of skills that were never really experienced before. They were good at colour selection, décor, writing, designing, DIYs, they had excellent communication skills, they could sing and dance really well and so much more than they thought they were born with.
Over the years I realized I’m good at designing, I’m good at adapting a language, I’m good with the history and mythology. I’m good at encouraging people.
You must be thinking how can these make me unique, right? But that’s just the thing, it doesn’t matter if people can see your strengths. If you have a special connection with your strengths, they speak for themselves. Your skills and strengths don’t always need to help you make money, having the knowledge of these skills help you feel more confident and connected with yourself.
The journey to discovering your strengths is not as smooth and sometimes you need to ask those around you to tell you about their opinions on your strengths.
I remember asking others and I received compliments on my voice and I always said to myself, ‘So? How does it matter? I’m not a singer!’ but the compliments on my voice encouraged me to start my podcast later in my life. You never know what hidden strengths you discover at some point in your life and where they might just take you.
I recently worked with a client who has really good communications skills but since she didn’t know the local language, she had bitter experiences. She felt like an outsider. She is living in another country and the local language is different and despite knowing English she needed to learn the language. And this can be very challenging. We worked on overcoming her past experiences. And because she knew she was good in communicating and could make friends easily she decided to learn the local language. Initially she felt it would take her ages and ages to not only learn a new language but to be able to speak freely in that language but she realized it was pretty easy for her. She recalled how back in school and college she always loved learning about new languages and their culture. Now she’s learning the language and she’s slowly connecting with people there.
There’s no rule which says you only need to live with a few innate skills and strengths. But not knowing what they are, not discovering these skills and strengths can create various challenges in your life. Starting with your own confidence and self-esteem.
When you don’t know what your strengths are and when you don’t try to explore them it can be difficult to connect with people, your relationships are affected, you don’t get the opportunities that you should. Its quite easy to feel lost and might I say often feel manipulated by how others perceive you.
My professor once told me that I’m genuine as a person and it didn’t mean much to me but when I started my business, I realized what he meant. My mentor told me that I have an Inner-child that’s far more creative than my adult self and she was right.
A woman once told me my writing skill isn’t as good as hers and she wanted me to become her prodigy and of course I didn’t think I could write well so I went along with it only to realize I didn’t want to write like her in the first place and wanted to approach a different way of writing. I’m not a professional writer but my blog is received very well and has helped a lot of people in some way or the other, which is good enough for me.
In my Journey, I’ve met people who’ve helped me and directed me toward my strengths and I’ve met many who’ve underestimated me because I had no idea what my strengths were sometimes.
The importance of your strengths is so so essential.
I’d like to conclude by saying, try to figure our what your strengths are personally and professionally. If you already know them it’s okay you can always delve further. There’s more to you than you know. I hope this episode helps you in some way.
Thank you for listening.
I hope to talk to you soon.